Monday, September 22, 2008

High School Years

What is it about time, that makes things less harsh? Many of us looked back on our "High School Years" as vicious nasty years filled with cruelty from others and pain inflicted by thoughtless, arrogant, little people. Others of us look back on those years as a magical time, filled with friendships, wonder and discovery. I think most of us see it as a middle ground... somewhere between the two extremes. Rarely thinking of our own roles in causing discomfort to others, but remembering the things that effected each of us individually.
I remember my High School Years as an experience to be endured. I had a couple of friends, some closer than others, but I certainly never considered myself to be one of the popular kids. I was never comfortable hanging out in "Senior Corner" with the more socially adept kids. I went to a party or two, but could never let my guard down enough to really bond with anyone. I was certainly not "socially adept", or popular by any stretch of my imagination. In spite of that, as I approach the 25th year out of that world, I look back with nostalgia. A simpler time of life (not if you ask my two 9th graders!). When the most important thing was trying to get a girl to like you, wondering if there was going to be a pop-quiz in math, hoping to get an invitation to a party you had heard about indirectly.
It wasn't until I got to college, away from the expectations and pressures of the kids I had gone to school with for 12 years straight, to realize I was a pretty cool guy. I was popular, I dated cheerleaders, I went out for sports, I was a disc jockey on the radio, I went to parties, I HAD parties, and I made friends...LOTS of friends! So, why is it that I look back on high school and remember the pain, but I remember the simple things more fondly? Why do I see those days of yester-year and wonder what those people are doing? Granted, a few of them, I couldn't care less about...the bullies who belittled everyone who wasn't as strong, or outgoing. But it's the other ones; I guess it's the followers I wonder about. The ones who didn't realize they were followers; who acted bad toward you because they were afraid to NOT be one of the popular kids. The ones who were subconciously pigeon-holed by the same expectations and pressures I was, just different pigeon-holes...What kind of human beings did they turn into?
I'm hoping that they're the ones who come to the 25 year reunion, so I can see how they've matured. And I guess, to be honest with myself, so they can see me too. Hoping they've seen what @sses they were, and overcome it. Maybe realize what I did a long time ago, I'm a good person to know. And if they don't, well, I guess there's always my college friends! Eh?! ROFL
What the hell, I'm nostalgic and looking forward to it all!

1 comment:

Things that puzzle this other goddess.... said...

I'm glad you have some fond memories of high school. I do too! But most of my good buds that I kept in touch with aren't going to reunions either....maybe I'll make 50 when we're all toddering in on our walkers. :) Love you, ttptog